 Congratulations on the paperback release of LIFE B: OVERCOMING DOUBLE DEPRESSION, available now!
It’s been a year since LIFE B was published. What were your expectations ahead of its release, and how accurate have you found them to be? It took me much longer to write LIFE B than I’d thought it would, largely for two reasons: First, I hadn’t figured out the right structure for the memoir when I sold on proposal, and second, I had a lot to learn about writing a memoir! I was humbled by this entire process, and when I say humbled, I don’t mean I had huge expectations to begin with, rather that I had to humble myself before my own story, to acknowledge my flaws and errors, in order to finish the manuscript. So, as to how accurate my pre-release expectations were: Not very accurate at all! That has turned out to be a great gift. The vulnerability of sharing your story is a big risk, but it can also be a gift to others. How do you feel that sharing your story has had an impact on readers? I know that sharing my story has been a gift to myself and to some family members, while painful for other family members. I believe that the process of understanding my own narrative has been crucial to my healing. However, the reactions and compassion I’ve received from readers help me understand how crucial our own stories are for others. I’ve heard from people who were my nursery-school classmates on to high-school and college classmates, military-spouse friends, graduate-school friends, writer friends from unpublished to world famous–and I only include the last category so everyone will know that mental illness affects people at all levels. How do you feel society has progressed in de-stigmatizing our understanding of mental illness? What have we done right, and what still needs improvement? Many times over the years I’ve had people in my life say some version of “You have a perfect life! How can you be depressed?” One of the things I share is that depression (and other mental illnesses) doesn’t care whether you’re rich or poor, young or old, physically fit or not. Depression has different aspects: Genealogical, hereditary, and contextual (stressors). Everyone’s experience has a different mix of those things, and we have a long way to go until we take that in as a society. Do you think publishers would have published your memoir 20 years ago? 50 years ago? What has changed in society to make publishers open to the topic when they weren't before? How has psychology become more mainstream? Fifty years ago, no one would have touched this memoir; 20 years ago, someone might have, but I believe I would have been asked to make it more upbeat, maybe even with a women's-magazine "service-y" angle. What has changed in society is that so many more people have had to become open about discussing mental illness because it's affecting people of all ages, just as we've become so much more open to discussing other types of illness and diseases. I'm a strong feminist, and I firmly believe that all the "waves" feminism we've seen have made people realize that hiding challenges and/or pretending they don't exist cannot work. Part of that, of course, has to do with becoming more open about psychology and psychiatry, sciences that unnerve people because we can't "see" the mind. What would it look like for us as society to take the next step? Can you suggest specific improvements? The first specific improvement I would love to see in our society would be for children to learn more about their emotions and feelings (the two things are not congruent) at early ages, in many different ways. Books, television shows, games, curricula, you name it. Emotional intelligence is real and should be fostered like intellect. Second, we need better understanding of mental-health difficulties in the workplace. Someone who has a bad day is not in the same position as someone who has a panic attack. A person with bipolar syndrome might need specific dates and times off for therapeutic and medical appointments, yet also be one of the best employees on a team. We have to become more flexible about where and how and when and to whom people are allowed to disclose their status, and we also need to protect their privacy as they wish. As for health insurance, I wouldn't even know where to begin. So many people I know, at very different socioeconomic levels, struggle with finding proper care for the mental illnesses, with filling prescriptions for lifesaving medications, and with paying for life-changing in-patient programs. We have to find new ways to help. What aspects of mental illness that LIFE B discusses have you found readers are the least familiar with? The importance of knowing your family mental-health history. Authors like Robert Kolker (Hidden Valley Road) and Roxanna Asgarian (We Were Once a Family) have shown us families with mental-health challenges running through them; I tried, in my own way, to show that with my writing about my grandmothers in particular. I wish I had more information going further back, because from a few remarks and bits of information I have, I know that there were likely other family members, with other forms of mental illness, in the past, too. In addition to being an author, you also maintain an active and massive social media presence. How do you feel social media is tied to your identity as a writer? Anyone who follows or has met me online knows that WYSIWYG! One of the reasons I have a large following is because I keep it very real, but also very civilized. I know younger/newer influencers on various platforms care much less about decorum than I do. Times have changed. I don’t think my manners age me, though. They’re just part of who I’ve always been. I think of places like Twitter and Instagram as big cocktail parties, and at cocktail parties, we all want to feel a little bit fabulous for a little slice of time. Why not keep some of your life behind a veil? May is Mental Health Awareness month. In honor of that, do you have any mental health organizations or resources you’d like to spotlight? The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) works directly with policy makers to improve policies and awareness, as well as providing regional and local support to families and caregivers. Arlington, Virginia-based Crisis Link is part of the National Suicide Prevention Hotline and has been helping those in despair since 1969. The Wounded Warrior Project has a hashtag that says it all: #CombatStigma. We send our young people out to defend our country and sometimes forget that on return they aren’t okay. That must change.  Congrats on the release of A TRICK OF SPADES from Owl's Nest Publishers, which is available for purchase now!
What did your creative process for this book look like? A little unusual, honestly. In college, one of my professors encouraged me to apply for a research grant; basically, my university paid me to write the first draft. I spent three months working on the book like it was my job, forty hours a week of writing, editing, and reading comp titles and historical nonfiction. It was an incredible and probably unrepeatable experience. Of course, it still took another four years of work before Spades found a home at Owl’s Nest Publishers. What does your working space look like? What do you need in order to be productive? I have a lovely desk which I almost never use for writing! Instead, I tend to work curled up on the couch. The main thing I need in order to be productive is solitude–I don’t write well in public spaces or with other people around. I like some background noise, usually my writing playlist, and I do my best work in the evening. Talk to us about music. What are your favorite songs for writing? How do you switch it up? Do you have a theme song for yourself as a writing professional? I love listening to instrumental music when I write. Lots of Joe Hisaishi, Hans Zimmer, and John Powell. There’s some classical on there, too–I love Rimsky-Korsakov’s Scheherazade. I don’t know if I have a theme song for myself as a writer, but I do typically have a theme song for each of my books. For Trick of Spades, it’s “Do You Believe in Magic?” by The Lovin’ Spoonful. How did you initially get into writing? I started writing plays at the age of ten–they were blatant knockoffs of my favorite movies, books, and shows, of course. My friends and I would put them on for our families. What do you hope will draw readers to your work? If readers enjoy suspense, complex worldbuilding, and family dynamics, they might like Spades. Most of all, I hope readers are drawn to the characters. Colm and Clíana are so fun to write, and while there are plenty of magical hijinks, the heart of the story is that sibling relationship. Outside of writing, what do you like to do? (personal life outside of writing) Of course, like all writers, I love reading. I also love cooking, baking, experimenting with new cocktails, and pretty much anything that involves food. As you might guess from what I write about, I really enjoy studying history–and on any given weekend, you can find me shopping at estate sales and vintage boutiques. What are your favorite moments of both suspense, happiness, or other in your upcoming book? There’s a moment early on in the book, right as the plot begins to thicken, where the main character, Colm, has a conversation with one of the antagonists. It’s not exactly an action-packed scene, but it was incredibly fun to write in terms of the character dynamics. Colm has to be careful about what he reveals, while also persuading the antagonist to reveal something. It shows a lot about both characters. What are your favorite jokes and quotes in your upcoming book? I think I actually didn’t realize what was funny in Spades until I read it aloud to my nieces–for example, there’s a moment in which one of the characters, when cornered, throws a lamp at the villain. In my mind, she threw the lamp simply because it was in arm’s reach, but my nieces found it hilarious. How will you celebrate the book release? Probably with cocktails! My mum and I love inventing new ones, and every time I have a release, we mix up a drink inspired by the story. Could you tell us about authors who have inspired you? Oh, there have been so many! J.R.R. Tolkien and Ursula K. Le Guin, Rumer Godden and John Steinbeck, Jane Austen and George Eliot–pretty much any author I read and love inspires me. What advice do you have for aspiring authors? Just keep at it. And read a lot. Read a lot of different things. You can learn from any book you pick up, even if it isn’t in your genre, even if you don’t love it. Find other writers, and learn how to accept critique–I know it’s painful, but it’s the best way to improve. |
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